They had quoted us exactly, had done the amendments we requested and although they added some descriptive words which made it seem like Lucy was nervous when speaking (artistic licence as she wasn't nervous at all). We didn't like the official pictures taken in the hotel as they are so false and staged, I had not expected to have been photographed either, our personal pictures are so much better but the Mirror insisted on using their own.
Lucy's message:
Ok my last post
on here....as some of you may have seen or will see I have a story in today's
Sunday mirror (I look so fat!) you can search for it online should you want to
read it....... Anyway as the story states I have battled with demons for years.
Being transgender has led me to suicide attempts and years of a double life. I
am still the same person in many ways. I love my wife, children,family and love
my football. My new life as me starts tomorrow, if you want to stay friends
then drop me a friend request and I will gladly add you.... I apologise to
those whom I have kept this a secret from over the years but hopefully you will
understand why.
Being transgender is NOT a choice. It is who
you are. It is not a fad and doesn’t go away no matter how clever you are at
suppressing it and it is DEFINITELY NOT a fetish or driven by sexual
preference. No one in their right mind would CHOOSE to be transgender. Why
would you choose to open yourself up to having to pretend to be someone you are
not, the agony of having to live a life that is not yours, to the agony of
abuse from other people because you don’t fit the stereotype, look different,
put your body through lots of changes using hormones and surgery. Not many, if
any, of the people reading this will have a clue about the impact of this and
have no idea how much the associated dysphoria and depression can destroy
lives. Many transgender people live secret lives and a huge percentage never
ever tell anyone due to the social and family impact an admission like this can
cause. In one week a national transgender helpline received 5 phone calls from
wives where their partner/husband had died and they had found evidence of a
secret hidden transgender life. Many transgender people have lost their
relationships with their partners, family and friends. When you transition as
an adult, relationships have been built however these are where the transgender
person has been hiding behind a mask…. the inside is just the same person, it
really is, but the outside will change to at least get somewhere near to match
the true person inside but as changes are having to be made to something
already formed the changes are not as perfect as if they had been if they had
been born into the correct body in the first place.
For all her life, the love of my
life Lucy has lived a lie. She has hidden herself so well behind her mask that
practically everyone reading this will be shocked. I was the first person she
told and together we have lived a double life for the past 17 years. There are
a handful of friends and family who know and my children have known for a while
and have been amazingly supportive. We have made many friends in the trans
community and are actually quite well known. We have participated and assisted
with trans specific events, Lucy has DJ’ed many times for special events and in
LGBT+ clubs, attended Pride and Trans Pride and she even hosts her own Trans
radio station which is listened to in 29 countries. I am an admin of a
fantastic support group for partners of trans, write a blog, have contributed
to a partner support handbook and have written an article for partners in a
trans community magazine which Lucy has also featured in for her work with the
radio station.
So now is the time to be honest
and open to everyone. It is Lucy’s time and from now on we will stand side by
side openly on the journey we have ahead of us. We are a team and have been for
17 years and will continue to be. It’s going to be one hell of a rollercoaster
ride………
I am not asking for your
acceptance or support but should you want to provide this, that would be great,
as I am sure you will appreciate this is going to be bit of a crazy time for us.
This Facebook profile will remain however I will no longer be active on it.
Should you still want to remain friends and be part of our lives and our
journey you are welcome to join me on my other Facebook which I have been using
in tandem with this one for several years. We
have many community friends who have been friends with us for years who are on
my other profile so please bear this in mind if you do come and post anything.
Please don’t come to be nosy as that is the last thing we need at this stage,
and don’t come to post negative comments as that won’t be tolerated, only come
if you genuinely still want to stay in touch. I’m happy to privately answer
reasonable questions but please remember this is someone’s personal life.
This message is not visible to
everyone on my Facebook and if you can see this it is because I consider you to
be a friend.
Come and jump on the
rollercoaster with us………
And
if you are interested there is a small article in the Sunday Mirror.......The response from everyone for us both has been totally overwhelming. We just did not expect this level of acceptance and support. Lucy was and still is (8 days later) receiving messages from friends and acquaintances old and new from the football circles as well as personal friends and messages from strangers across the world. The same for me with messages and comments of support which are still coming in now and we are both making sure that we are responding to every single message...... the dodgy Facebook friend requests are another thing! To be honest we were both in shock with it and the amount of interest in our story. At the end of the day we are just Lucy and Avril. I have to admit that the relief I have felt with us no longer hiding away has been immense.
It did not take long for other UK newspapers such as the Daily Mail and The Sun to pick up the story and publish their own articles using the Mirror interview but they found some pictures on Lucy's twitter which she had forgotten about. To be honest we did not mind them stealing these pictures as these were our pictures of us and we think we both look so much better in them! Before we knew it we had gone global.... papers all over the world were publishing our story and every single one was retaining the same positive spin created by the Mirror which we were pleasantly surprised about.
We have kept away from the comments on the articles on social media, twitter etc as to be honest we know what they will be saying. We did have a peek and it did seem like the papers themselves were moderating many of the comments (twitter was a different story) and it seemed to be mainly positive comments however any positive comment would have about 10 times as many dislikes as likes as this was the only was the only way for some of the trolls to get their opinion across. To be honest, a strangers opinion of us and our situation does not bother us. We have seen all the negative comments before many, many times on other transgender specific articles so we knew what to expect. Personally we have received nothing nasty or derogatory.....yet.....
Now for Lucy's first football match later that day..........
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